its a 98. or. is it in fact a very obvious 42

well its 10 years to the day that douglas adams died. He is one of my hero's and the hitch hiker books remain my favourite books. i've read them close to ten times and know them pretty much back to front. i've read everything he ever published and the 3 biographies of him and his works. i could talk for pages and pages about how important his work has been, personaly and on a somewhat larger scale. his life is absolutely fascinating and speaks to myself and countless others i'm sure. for one reason which is that he never wanted to be a writer, and infact didn't enjoy the process much of the time. he wanted to perform to begin with and to make films, he kindof...just ended up as a writer. like he was cornered and coudnt go anywhere else. that certainly isn't to detract from his achievments which were considerable and i don't mean to say that he failed himself. that isn't how he felt about it, he was extremely happy about many of his creations.

anyway, to celebrate his memory and life i read a the first few chapters from life, the univers, and everything. these are some of my absolute favourite hitch hikers moments. simply because of the way arthur and fords relationship is portrayed, i think it is a very good definition for how there relationship works all through the books, here it is fully typed by hand-

‘I may,’ he added with a grin which would have sent sane men scampering into trees, ‘have been imagining it.’ He waited for a reaction from Arthur, but Arthur knew better than that.
‘Carry on,’ he said evenly.
‘The point is, you see,’ said Ford,’ that there is no point driving yourself mad trying to stop yourself going mad. You might just as well give in and save your sanity for later.’
‘And this is you sane again, is it?’ said Arthur. ‘I ask merely for information.’
‘I went to Africa,’ said Ford.
‘Yes?’
‘Yes.’
‘What was that like?’
‘And this is your cave is it?’ said Ford.
‘Er, yes,’ said Arthur. He felf very strange. After nearly four years of isolation he was so relieved to see Ford that he could almost cry. Ford was, on the other hand, an almost immediately annoying person.
‘Very nice,’ said Ford, in reference to Arthur’s cave. ‘You must hate it.’

as much as arthur is relieved to see foord, he is an almost immediatley annoying person ha ha ha. the next bit where they shake hands is just really really touching and sweet and then they chase a chesterfield sofa across the field. arthur giving a whoop of joy. the way douglas describes this scene is excellent as in 'don't panic' by neil gaiman. douglas talks about the process of getting them from prehistoric england to modern day earth (which was obviously destroyed very early on) in such a way that you sort of don't question it. it happens gradualy, and gets weirder as igoes along so that it seems perfectly reasonable and satisfactory.
he was such a fucking awesome and fantasticaly clever man, i feel privaleged to have books like his that i can read and re-read at my leisure.





towel day is on the 25th of may, so you strags best all know where they are.


blogs, don't to me about blogs, i hate them.



many thanks douglas,

love elrossiter x

double whammy anniversary festo tuesday! or 60 and 365

hello there!

i'm kinda rusty at this as its been thirteen weeks and a day since my last blog and i'm sincerely sorry guys and girls!! but i'll just ramble a bit and then post, typical elrossiter style yo.

ITS NOT A WIND-UP LOVE, I REALLY THINK LIKE THIS IS A YEAR OLD TODAY!!! cue fanfare, screaming women and victoria sponge. and its my sixtieth post, cue mild whoops and maybe a single high five then getting on with our lives. hence double whammy anniversary festo-though to be honest i'm sure there has to be some sort of 'happening' or 'event spectacularrrr' or shennanigan tomfoolery of some sort so this is probably false advertising but hey-SHIT happens!
so how'm i celebrating this momentous occasion i hear you holler. well now just calm yourselves down an i shall kindly tell you. to celebrate i am drinking a cammomile tea and listening to echo and the bunnymen....but before you despair and jump to the conclusion that ole elrossiter has gone soft on you just hold your horses yeah!! for i have been coach travelling from that london and been (a bit) ill so there you go. i have been having many a late night in that london though and having good times so don't write me off!

god i'm so easily distracted at the moment and i don't even know who i'm talking to hear really. an actual real person may read it at some point but i don't know what i'm expecting. i suppose i'm just writing to myself really, i don't fuckin know, i just enjoy throwing down random thoughts and clearing my mind a bit. if you don't like it you won't read it will you?? so nought ventured, nought gained!



some contemporary entertainment for you-




saw this last night, it was actually really really good and i recommend it! like many people i was of the oppinion that sherlock holmes and doctor watson runnin around, swearing and being a bit uncouth was not what it should be about! but having seen it i have to say it that it pretty much works. it makes sense for them to have such skills and would seem to be a nessesity given the time period. though i think the whole 'cage fight' type thing with holmes 'was' too much and quite unnessasary really.
but anyway the writing was great, the story great, sets great, cast was brilliant, relationships between characters entirely believable and realistic and the set-up for more films was done nicely too!
GREAT FILM-go see!!





just finished reading this.
very briefly-it was alright.

things i didnt like-a few of the things he did with the characters, the sections without anyone of the existing HH characters-what was the point, didnt really conclude the series or bring any particular closure or 'oh, thats alright then' sort of feelings which i'd thought was kindof the point-that he was finishing it off.

things i did like-he pretty much got the characters right and i believed his writing of them, his style was 'though obviously not exact' close enough to douglas' that it worked and it was easily accepted, some good moments that made me laugh, that he didnt do anything 'too' horrific or unaceptable with any of the characters and didnt bring marvin back, a couple of nice douglas adams ref's that you would have missed if you didnt no much about the great man.

my main problem was that eoin didnt make that much use of this incredible opportunity, douglas was always commenting on society's nonsensical ways, on technology, religion, politics, and so many things-now mostly harmless was released in 1992, thats nearly 18 years ago, how was has happened since then that doulglas would have been picking up on??? lots basically and eoin didnt really seem to give it much thought. so in that respect 'and another thing' was fairly dissapointing, like i finished it and i was just like 'oh. right. okay then'.
well i dunno, i'm sure there are many other people who havent been nearly as kind or fair when reviewing this book and i have tried to be at least objective. it didnt grocely offend me so i'm thankfull for that!! any oppions??



well now i'm listening to billy bragg ha ha ha so heres to another year of I,N,A,W,U,L,I,R,T,L,T, thanking you muchly if you've ever glanced at this blog, obviously mistaking it for something else them hastilly scrambling elsewhere.



well two out of three were contemporary so i'll count that as a win!

look after yourselves


brought to you by
covered in bee's,
don't let the bastards grind you down,
satisfying my blogging itch,
the late and great douglas adams

elrossiter x x x x

blog number 59 is brought to you by the sirrius cybernetics corporation, share and enjoy! or. hitchhikers guide published 30 years ago, WHOOT!

thats right folks! 30 years since that most remarkable book was published. better selling than the cellestial homecare omnibus, more thrilling than 27 more things to do in zero gravity and more popular than the encyclopedia galactica in two respects. one, it is slightly cheaper, and two, it comes with the words 'DON'T PANIC' embroidered in larege friendly letters on the cover.

done from memory so forgive mistakes guys, gals and small furry creatures from alpha centuri.

bloody honestly, whats not to love about these books?? every time i read them they are just as thrilling, moving, ball acheingly funn, wise, clever, and above all-entertaining as hell!!

some favourite things off the top of my loaf

-the relationship between ford and arthur

-the beware of the leopard bit

-when arthur see's fenchurch again for the first time while driving (before the raffle bit) and is so excited he nearly runs her over then hits her with the car door which flings her umbrella into the road. arthur helfuly says SHIT!

-at milliways when ford is explaining to arthur about how the universe started 'for a kicker' ''you get this bath see, and its connical see....''

-slartibartfast

-didnt i tell you i have a brain the size of a planet

-and basically the rest of the books really...


one of my favourite moments from all five books is at the start of 'Life..
Arthur has been onj his own in his cave for i think 3 years while fords gone off to explore. Arthur gets up one morning after his usual scream of horror and calmly announces to the world that he will go mad. Ford is perched on a rock watching and says 'good idea, did me the world of good' Arthur is massively shocked and also greatly relieved to see a real person, on the other hand ford is an almost immediately annoying person. ford puts his hand out and Arthur eventually shakes, putting all his relief and joy into it-ford disengages. after some mad explaining a sofa appears and is bobbing away acrross a field.
for very clear and distinct reaons they have to catch it. and they rlease whoops of joy and delight. they let everything go, all there worries, frustration, everything. and laughing and calling to each other to head off this irrational piece of furniture eventually catch it.

its a wonderfull moment, full of joy.


thanks for reading!!!! what'r your favourite moments??


brought to you by the constant genius of douglas adams,
excitment of that london,
and swindonia

elrossiter x x x x x x x x

elrossiter is here to receive your calls and information. or. ten days and alls well, hello, is this 57?

so i wake up at some undisclosed time early this friday morning, its still dark so not that early. and i litterally hear a sort of sizzling, burning sound. then quickly realise its on my bed, on my duvet. so i push the covers and jump out of bed, like pretty damned sharpish!! i htink by the time i was out of bed and stood looking at it, the sound was gone and i was slightly beggining to realise that maybe. . . . . something was slightly. . . not quite right. so i go an flick the light on and shuffle back over to the bed, i'm yaknow 'out of it like' and i look at the duvet and lift it up and look under it and that and ascertain that everythings fine and it was just my mind going a bit mental - so business as usual. i switch off the light and go back to bed. offcourse when i get back in i'm bein cautious and tentative, you know. . . just incase. you can't be too carefull can you?

it was the fact that i heard this ssssss burning or hissing, and i'm sure i saw the crease of duvet as something more than it was. it looked brighter and maybe coiled together and as if it could have been meting down toward my, well, legs! i could have been imaging a scene from one of the alien films. maybe ressurection when one of the aliens is slashed open and you see intestines an stuff burning through the floor.
just another case of hallucinatory/dream doing stuff. s'all good.


stand by for a hitchikers at 30 blogtactulerrrrrrr! WHOOT!! maybe satdi when i'm ungover like




hallucionatory dream time folks!

brought to you by irish cream coffee,
madness,
good peoples,
vogon poetry is offcourse the third worst in the univers. . .

elrossiter x x x x x xx x xx x x x x

42nd post is it then, this can mean but one thing! or. you guessed it

blog number 42. can you really blame me for giving you some hitchhikers guide to the galaxy?! i mean come on there's just really no excuse NOT to throw some hitchhikers into the mix. i'd haveto be a madman not to! not that i've ever needed an excuse before like. anyways its a good bit at the restaurant at the end of the universe, not an obvious bit either. your welcome



arthur turned to ford - he hadn't quite got this place worked out in his mind.
'look, surely' he said, 'if the universe is about to end . . . don't we go with it?' ford gave him a three-pan-galactic-gargle-blaster look, in other words a rather unsteady one.
'no,' he said, 'look,' he said, 'as soon as you come into this dive you get held in this sort of amazing force-shielded temporal warp thing. i think.'
'oh,' said arthur. he turned his attention back to a bowl of soup he'd managed to get from the waiter to replace his steak.
'look,' said ford, 'i'll show you.'
he grabbed at a napkin off the table and fumbled hoplessly with it.
'look,' he said again, 'imagine this napkin, right, as the temporal universe, right? and this spoon as a transductional mode in the matter curve. . .'
it took him a while to say this last part, and arthur hated to interrupt him.
'thats the spoon i was eating with,' he said.
'all right,' said ford, 'imagine this spoon. . .' but found it rather tricky to pick up, 'no, better still this fork. . .'
'hey would you let go of my fork?' snapped zaphod.
'all right,' said ford, 'all right, all right. why don't we say. . . why don't we say that this wine glass is the temporal universe. . .'
'what, the one you've just knocked on the floor?'
'did i do that?'
'yes.'
'all right.' said ford, ' forget that. i mean. . . i mean, look, do you know - do you know how the universe actually began for a kick-off?'
'probably not,' said arthur, who wished he'd never embarked on any of this.
'all right,' said ford, 'imagine this. right. you get this bath. right. a large round bath. and its made of ebony.'
'where from?' said arthur. 'harrods was destroyed by the vogons.'
'doesn't matter.'
'so you keep saying.'
'listen.'
'all right.'
'you get this bath, see? imagine you've got this bath. and it's ebony. and it's conical.'
'conical?' said arhtur. 'what sort of. . .'
'shhh!' said ford. 'it's conical. so what you do is, you see, you fill it with fine white sand, all right? or sugar. fine white sand, and/or sugar. anything. doesn't matter. sugar's fine. and when it's full, you pull the plug out. . . are you listening?'
'i'm listening.'
'you pull the plug out, and it all just twirls away, twirls away you see, out of the plughole.'
'i see.'
'you don't see. you don't see at all. i haven't got to the clever bit yet. you want to hear the clever bit?'
'tell me the clever bit.'
'i'll tell you the clever bit.'
ford thought for a moment, trying to remember what the clever bit was.
'the clever bit,' he said, 'is this. you film it happening.'
'clever,' arthur agreed.
'you get a movie camera, and you film it happening.'
'clever.'
'that's not the clever bit. this is the clever bit, i remember now that this is the clever bit. the clever bit is that you then thread the film in the projector. . . backwards!'
'backwards?'
'yes. threading it backwards is deffinately the clever bit. so then, you just sit and watch it, and everything just appears to spiral upwards out of the plughole and fill the bath. see?'
'and that's how the universe began is it?' said arhtur.
'no,' said ford, 'but it's a marvellous way to relax,'
he reached for his wine glass.
'where's my wine glass?' he said.
'it's on the floor.'
'ah.'
tipping back his chair to look for it, ford collided with the small green waiter who was approaching the table carrying a portable telephone.
ford excused himself to the waiter explaining that he was extremely drunk.
the waiter said that that was quite all right and that he perfectly understood.
ford thanked the waiter for his kind indulgence, attempted to tug his forelock, missed by six inches and slid under the table.







brought to you by pure and unfiltered genius

elrossiter x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x

'apparently' monday the 19th of january is the most depressing day of the year. ho hum, sigh etc

i want you all to know i'm feeling very depressed, not really (no more than usual at any rate) monday the 19th of january is the most dee-pressing day of the year according to all those wonderful experts, but don't top yourself it'll be tuesday tommorrow probably, i'm no expert in these matters. just have a cup o'tea and think about somethin else is my advise, tea is the answer to everything oh yes!



any hitchhikers guide to the galaxy/ian dury and the blockheads fans out there WON'T BELIEVE THIS!!!
http://www.hhgproject.org/media/Marvin_The_Paranoid_Android_-_Reasons_To_Be_Miserable.mp3

and more and more and more-

http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://photopile.com/photos/Era_Galactica/auctions/189607.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.startrekfans.net/index.php%3Fshowtopic%3D27720%26hl%3Dmarvin&usg=__e8lG5XYWaVW9YHN2SgBwfOYt0uo=&h=540&w=530&sz=76&hl=en&start=19&sig2=1t3BoZadEj8-vuiiCvC0tQ&um=1&tbnid=E9DD7s1iCCQUeM:&tbnh=132&tbnw=130&ei=pph0Sc2cBZ3HjAeegYG4BQ&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dmarvin%2Bthe%2Bparanoid%2Bandroid%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26safe%3Doff%26rls%3DRNWN,RNWN:2006-41,RNWN:en%26sa%3DG - how wonderfull!!!!

there are 'apparently' eight hundred and ninety eight active satellites in our atmosphere, do you think theres like a starbucks satellite or a scientologist satellite? maybe will smith has one, or like a wimpy satellite thats out of commission and fallen into an unstable orbit, it could fall on your house (if it didn't break up in the atmosphere)

imagine the wimpy satellite landing in your garden!

r.i.p. Tony Hart, he was truly a top bloke.


this blog is brought to you by grey shirts, the book 'space' by stephen baxter and the songs isolation by john lennon, isolation by iggy pop-featuring none other than david bowie! and quarantine by the cakes. i'm off to the kettle, bye!

elrossiter x x x x x x x x x